F L A S H B A C K

A D V I K

I feel Sahil's angry glares at the side of my face and chuckle. Suhana, again, asked me to ask the new boy to join us for lunch. I did. He seemed alone. And apparently Mehrotra-Sahdev are in their 'don't leave anyone alone' era. Or so I thought.

Sahil ain't one of us. As open as he was yesterday for when Falak joined us, he's double 'not in favour' of this. This new guy--Yug joining us. But ab toh ho gya?

"Shea. Stop it." Sahil grips her wrist, stopping Ahaana from sneaking him half of her parantha.

"Shea? I thought her name is Ahaana." Yeah. The new boy doesn't know how to shut up. He hasn't since we asked him to join us.

"He calls her Shea." I flick hand towards Sahil. Yug beams at my sister. He's so enchanted by her. "You give me my little sister kinda vibes, little Shea." Yug touches Ahaana's nose, she smiles at him bright. He's making her laugh continuously since he joined us. Sahdev siblings DOES NOT like him and the whole situation.

"You have a little sister?" Ahaana queries.

"Yeah. She's in kindergarten this year." Yug replies forwarding his sandwich to my sister, my eyes widen when she takes a bite. What the heck? Why she's so open with him today? She hates strangers. She doesn't share her spoons with anyone, leave biting from the same sandwich.

"Shea!" Sahil's hand slaps on the table loudly, she looks at him, her mouth full. "I-t gool." Ahaana says motioning at the sandwich. I chuckle reaching out to wipe her lips... but Falak beats me to it. Suhana Ahaana looks at her. "You... had something there." Falak points at the corner of her lips. Ahaana lowly murmurs 'thankyou'. She has been more open with Yug than Falak.

"You like it? You can have it." Yug gives his entire box to her, she happily accepts and gives her lunch box to him. Sahil keeps glaring daggers at her.

My shoes touch something, I quickly pull my foot back and at the same Falak looks at me. We saved a seat for her by scaring the nerd away who sat ahead of Sahil and I— Sahdev did the scaring. But he also took her bench mate with him, leaving Falak to sit alone. Until the new guy came and sat next to Falak.

Obviously the girls couldn't resist asking him to have lunch with us. It was all going okay, until Yug decided he wants to make Ahaana laugh.

I almost jump in my place feeling my foot bump into something. Again. Falak and I look at each other. Sahil clears throat making me turn my gaze to him from Falak, I raise an eyebrow, questioning what he wants. My best friend smirks in return glancing at Falak and then back to me. I control the urge to get on the desks separating us and punch him in the nose.

He has been giving me the teasing smile since he noticed me look at her for more than a second yesterday. We were watching movie with our parents and Dadu last night, he picks up the fallen lash from Suhana's cheeks and goes, "Mehrotra, see, Falak." When everyone looked at him confused, he corrected himself, "Mispronounced. I meant palak." I will never forget how both the mothers looked at me for a long time after that Falak-Palak thing.

Fine. Her silence, hidden scared glances, shyness has enticed me a little bit, but that doesn't mean I'm crushing on her. She's my classmate just like the other seventeen girls in the class. She's no different.

But you've never waited for any other 'classmate' of yours, leaning against the class room door ever before.

Shut up. I wasn't waiting for her. I just wanted to stand there. Catch my breath and all.

For the first time ever in history? Sure.

My subconscious mind has been manipulated by Sahil Sahdev, so ignore it.

•••

F A L A K

Changing school is hard on everyone but more so on someone who hates changes. Being a single child has its perks and disadvantages. My father lost his everything to his brother. He had to start all over again from the bottom. I was four years old when we suddenly shifted from living with my uncle and his family to us three being alone in an old worn out room.

It took my parents years to get back on their feet and better our lifestyle. I was eight years old when my grandfather came to live with us. I was elated. My parents worked day and night to build the company of their dreams and I wanted to be at home and not at my parents workplace after school. That stopped when Dadaji came.

Change has been constant in my life, yet the thing I'm scared of the most. In the last eight years we have shifted house six times. My parents says this house will be our forever residence. They say they finally bought this for us and we'll always live here.

Changing houses means changing school. Of course, I have been through this same situation many times but that doesn't mean it doesn't scare me. It does, more so, if this one is filled with students who come from backgrounds that you're extremely new to.

I was late to class. Late. On the first day. The eyes of students holed into me. I wanted to go and hide in dark. Somewhere no one could look at me. Until I met those eyes. I don't even know how I found the courage to look up and that too at him. One blink and the eyes were lost in my surroundings.

I spent the first half of my school day, sitting alone, giving introductions to every teacher who came. No one tried to initiate a conversation with me. I wanted to because being alone was crippling my skin in anxiety, but I didn't know how to. I tried finding those eyes again, but no such luck. I didn't see his face. I just saw his eyes until I blinked and lost them. So I didn't know who I was looking for.

Then, I found them again at the lunchtime.

Advik. His name's Advik and man, that boy does not know how to shut up. He's the last bencher, who makes the entire class shake up in laughter with a silent broody best friend by his side and two beautiful little girls joining him--them for lunch.

I found out Suhana—the one with same broody expression like her brother, is Sahil's sister. And the little one—the one who seems to be scared of everyone around her other than those three, is Ahaana. Advik's sister

Advik. That man has to just speak, respond to every-little-thing. Like I said, he doesn't know how to shut up. Yet, he doesn't say a word when I'm around.

And he's such a great brother. I don't know what's wrong with Ahaana but something surely is because they give her meds after lunch, and all three of them are super protective of her. They don't let her carry anything. They don't let her move things. Advik doesn't let her sit on the bench herself, he picks her up and sets her down and she hates it. She despises whatever they do. There's fury in her eyes every time she wants to do something but these three beat her to it.

She wants to hold her own lunchbox but Suhana doesn't let her. She wants to get in the bench herself but Advik picks her up like she weighs nothing—I guess she doesn't much by the looks of it but still, she's super uncomfortable of Advik putting her on chair like she's a toddler. And Sahil, that man, I don't even know why he doesn't take his eyes off her. I mean I understand about Advik but him? The man who doesn't speak to anyone the whole day suddenly becomes a tease when she's around. He tugs on her pigtails. He pinches her, has something sarcastic to say for whatever Ahaana speaks. He's a clown around her.

"You guys have different surnames so I'm sure you aren't siblings or cousins, but how are you all so close? Neighbours?" I finally ask the one thing that's been bothering me for a week now. A week. It's been a week of us having lunch together and helping each other in home-works. I do the helping even though I am the new girl. Sahil and Advik are true definition of troublemakers and they never finish their home-works, ever. Since they found out I am on time of each class work, they started copying my work.

"We are neighbours but not like the usual neighbours." Advik clears his throat. He's the only one who actually started responding or conversing. Ahaana and Sahil just never speaks other than to eachothers that too is mostly eye talks, and Suhana, well her facial expressions is enough for me to never try initiate a conversation with her— Yug needs to stop as well. I think Suhana's on verge of punching him in the nose the next time he gets in her face to try and make her talk.

"Our grandfather were friends. They came to Mumbai together and did everything else together. They were each others only family before getting married and the bond continues with us being families." Advik says. He tells us about their living situation and how they do everything together.

"It's like you all are siblings." Yug comments.

"No." Sahil snaps at him so loud and so fast, it makes me jump in the chair. Advik looks at me, his face etched in worry at my jumpscare, when I breathe out calming myself, he turns to give his friend a look.

"Don't. Don't ever call her my sibling. I don't like the idea of this tiny human being Sahdev." Sahil gestures at Ahaana who looks at him with squinted eyes. He gives her a evil smile. Ahaana picks up the fork and reaches to scratch his face. Suhana and Advik pull them away, when Sahil goes to tug her pigtails which he does every second when she's around.

"Are you mad? Stop trying to hurt a little cute gorgeous baby girl!" Yug looks at Sahil, shocked. The latter one looks away from Ahaana to Yug, his face goes from teasing to irritated.

"Don't make me send you away." That's why I don't like his attitude. He thinks he did us a favour by letting us sit with them for lunch and he keeps taunting Yug on this.

I gulp the rage brimming in me. No, you can't get on the desks and scratch his face. You can't Falak. You can't!

"Don't ever call her that again." Sahil mutters just before the bell rings. The girls quickly start collecting their lunch box. "We'll do this. You go." Advik says raising up. Suhana stands up on the desk and jumps down. Ahaana tries to follow her but Advik reaches to pick her up.

"Let her. She wants to." I speak without thinking it through. Advik looks at me, "She'll hurt herself." He quietly murmurs.

"I won't. Promise." Ahaana quickly says. Advik shares a look with Sahil who hates this whole thing and is now looking at me with anger brimming in his orbs. I ignore him and smile at Ahaana, she finally meets my eyes but doesn't smile. Advik sidesteps, Ahaana jumps down and lets out a happy giggle when she makes it through. Suhana threads her fingers with Ahaana's and the girls runs out of our classroom.

"Why do you treat her like that?" Yug questions when we all are wrapping up our lunch boxes. Sahil doesn't reply and leaves to wash his hands. Yug and I look at Advik.

"She's... we don't really know what's wrong with her. She gets sick really easily, so much so that we have to admit her. Weak Immune System and much more." Advik shrugs off. Yeah, she seems weak but I think with the way they treat her, trying to keep her bubble wrapped, it's just making her unhappy. She wants to do things like Suhana can but them treating her like a sick person is only making her dive deeper in herself.

I keep my opinion to myself. These guys have grown up together, they know each other better than I can ever. It's better if I just stay mum.

•

One month. It's been a month of us knowing each other. The six of us sitting together for lunch. When the girls aren't with us, it's the four of us. Sahil has started talking and having fun with us, he has finally accepted us in their group. But Ahaana hasn't. She still stays mum. It's only with me. She talks to Yug like they are long lost friends—something Sahil despises most, but with me she crawls back into her shell like a tortoise.

I want her to be open with me how she's with Suhana. I don't know why but she just makes me want to be important to her. Advik is really close to her. The siblings have inside jokes and I don't know why but I want in, in those jokes. It's extremely weird of me.

But I sometimes understand why I feel the way I do. My mother told me last week about why I don't have any siblings. She said, she was going to have a baby when I was two and half years old but god took my little sister away from us when she was about to enter our lives in a month. Mumma says she was eight months pregnant when we lost my little sister. After that she decided I'm going to be her only baby.

"Sorry." I hear him whisper right after our feet touch under the chair. Again. I glance at Advik and blink my eyes in 'it's okay' look, he bites down on his bottom lip and looks back into his notebook. Yug and I sit on the second last bench and Sahil & Advik on the last bench, so infinite times in a single day our feet bump into each other. Advik has the habit of stretching his legs out which comes under my bench. Every time this happens, Sahil snorts trying to control himself from laughing out loud, I don't know why. 

At this point, I should be habitual of our little touch but I don't know why, every time it happens it sends the same jitters in my body. I shake myself out of whatever's running in my head and focus in the class.

•

One and half months later.

"Where's Ahaana today? She didn't come to school?" I question Sahil, because let's face it only he knows her exact whereabouts with all the million times he visits her class to bother her.

"Did she get sick again?" Yug looks at all three Mehrotra-Sahdev's.

"No." Finally Advik speaks up, "she's not sick and she did come to school but we all had a fight last night, so she came with our grandfather and she's not going to be joining us for lunch starting today." My mood instantly drops down, even though she still doesn't speak to me but her bantering with Sahil and calling Advik stupid in million ways always makes me smile. No wonder Sahil's been more agitated than usual and Advik remained silent in all the lectures.

"Oh. So, she's alone in the class?" I ask Suhana, who shakes her head in negative. "She went to the hockey field to have lunch." Yug instantly turns around and slides his side of curtain and window away, I lean over Yug to spot her but find her nowhere.

"She sits behind the bleachers, that's her spot." Sahil says without even glancing at the window or us, playing with his food.

I turn back straight and shut my lunch box before raising up from the desk and walking to the door with my lunch box. I make my way downstairs and to the hockey field and like Sahil said, I find her behind the bleachers in one go. I see her playing with her food, her eyes lowered down, I settle down beside her. She glances at me before turning back to playing with the food.

I don't speak to her not knowing how she would react. I gently forward my lunch box towards her, "Do you want to have poha if you don't like your lunch?" 

"I don't like poha but I love pulao." She grumbles with her hand on one side of her mouth and the same elbow above her folded knees.

"Then why aren't you eating?"  She says nothing to that. I continue looking at her before finally gathering some strength to ask her what's wrong but she speaks before I can.

"Do you also see me as a weak, pathetic little girl who can't be left alone for even five minutes?" She meets my eyes, her eyes glossy like it's taking everything in her to not burst in tears. My hands on their own cup her cheeks.

"No. I don't. I see you as a girl who even though is tired and probably pissed whenever those three pull any overprotective stunt, but still she bears it all without tantrums because she knows they have her absolute welfare in their mind." At my words her bottom lip wobbles and tears run down her eyes. I wipe them off and slide closer to her.

"What happened, Aahu? Tell me, I promise I will do whatever I can do to better it." I wrap my arms around her shoulder and hug her close. She cries more in my chest and it stings so bad in my heart, the kind of pain I haven't felt before.

"Last... last night they were p-playing basket--basketball. One bhaiya from our society was teaching them, but--but Sahil made me stand away. Saying I will hurt myself. I listened to him and s-stayed away but then bhaiya called me and picked me up in his arms... to-to help me throw a ball. I lost my balance when he was putting me down." She stops to take a long sobbing breath before continuing, "it didn't even hurt that bad but they started yelling at me right there. Infront of everyone. Sa-Sahil scolded me saying why did I step foot inside the court. When Bhaiya tried to intervene, they left the game and got me upstairs, scolding me all the while." 

"Even Dadda supported them saying they just want me to be safe." She pulls away her face from my chest with her face turned red from all the crying, I wipe her tears off. 

"Shh... no more crying now. Come." I stand up and forward her my hand, she looks at me confused, "where?" 

"They yelled at you in front of everyone na, we will scold them in front of everyone as well." She keeps looking at me for a few moment before her face finally lights up. She slides her hand in mine and lets me tug her up. Bending down we both gather our lunch boxes and hand in hand start walking back to the classroom. 

"Falak di, Sahil gussa honge." She freezes herself right at the entrance, her eyes on him, just as he lifts his head as if feeling someone staring at him, Ahaana hides herself.

"Firstly, no di. Yes, I do see you as my little sister but it would be very weird if you call me di, just Falak is fine, okay?" She nods in reply, I smile lightly touching her nose before taking her hand back again in mine. 

"I'll see kaise gussa hota hai wo." I tug her with me. When Sahil looks at the little girl following me, he gets up from his seat. I slam my lunch box on Advik and Sahil's desk and then gesture at Ahaana to do the same, she does but not loud enough like how I did.

"How could you?" I look at all three of them with squinted eyes. Sahil ignores me question and asks her, "Roya tu?" She shows him tongue and then hides behind me, Sahil's eyes glide to me.

"Who gave you the right to yell at her? To stop her from doing whatever she wants to? You three do whatever you want but she's not even allowed to run?" I don't keep my voice down, Ahaana fists my shirt from behind.

"Our parents actually. They asked us to make sure she's alright since she was a little baby." Suhana replies to me in her nonchalant attitude and it instantly dries my throat. I'm not scared of anyone but this 9-year old. Suhana Sahdev scares me more than anything, I don't know why.

I clear my throat before focusing on the guys who I'm not scared of. That much. "Yeah whatever, from now on we will not sit at your bench. Until and unless you go down on your knees and beg for her forgiveness for behaving how you did yesterday, we will not speak to--"

I don't even finish my warning and Sahil Sahdev instantly kneels but between the gap of his desk which almost hides him kneeled down. But I get that he didn 't do it knowingly, he wanted her forgiveness no matter what. "Sheu... dekh.." I feel her head shake in my back as she hides herself in me. Sahil tugs on Advik's hand who shakes head but kneels down beside his best friend.

"Aahu, sorry bachu." Advik coos to his sister and I swear his words does something to me. His tone does something to me. I feel both my heart flutter and break at the same time. I don't have anyone to speak me to this sweetly, I don't think I ever will. And happiness because their bond has made me the happiest in such long time. It's their bond and the type of friendship I'm slowly building with these people that makes me happy.

"Promise you won't ever do this again?" Ahaana asks them still hidden behind me. 

"Promise." Sahil and Advik says in unison. Ahaana slides out from behind me and grins at them, right at that moment the bell rings. Ahaana's face drops before she shakes her head and picks her lunchbox. Suhana gets up from the desk and leaves, knocking her shoulder in my chest. Ahaana watches her leave with squinted forehead. Suhana doesn't turn back and asks Ahaana to come or anything, she just leaves the classroom.

"Thankyou & bye." Ahaana smiles at me before motioning at me to lean down a little bit, I do and she presses her lips to my cheeks before rushing out of the classroom. Advik yells 'careful' behind her but she's already out of earshot.

•

"Falak!" I hear Sahil call out when I open the door to my awaiting car. I turn around. Advik, Sahil and Yug stops in front of me. "Since you were out of the class with Shea, we forgot to ask you, would you like to join us all for vacation?" Sahil asks me.

"Vacation? To where?" 

"We have a place in Lonavala, every year it was just the four of us but we want you and Yug to join us this time." Advik smiles at me, to which my lips start stretching on their own. His smile is so cute, it makes his eyes twinkle.

"I will have to ask my parents." I look away from Advik and towards Sahil who already has his eyes on both Advik and I, his lips stretched from one side. Poor way of smiling!

"Yes, of course. If they want to speak to our parents, here's the contact number." Sahil slides me the little paper he had in his hand. There's five contact number written on it. 

--Grandpaa. Samyak Sahdev. Avni Sahdev. Shika Mehrotra. Rudra Mehrotra. 

"Try not to dial on the last number, he's Mehrotra's father and you don't want to speak to him. No one does." Sahil comments before running to their car. "Not cool, Sahdev." Advik yells behind him. Yug waves at us before going to his car. I look back at Advik.

"I-Ahaana would love it if you joined us." Advik says ans later bites on his bottom lip, his cheeks seems flushed. I look down as smile takes over my face.

"I'll ask my parents and let you know." I reply back, he nods and whispers 'bye' before walking to his car. I slide the little paper in my skirt pockets and settle down in the car.

Our summer vacations starts from 1st June, a week from now. With my grandfather going for a while, I guess Mumma-Papa will allow me. 

•

"Mumma. Papa." I gain my parents attention at the dinner table after my grandfather left for his room. My father instantly looks at me and smiles. "Yes, bugu." I give him a look at the name before coming to the point.

"Remember I told you about my friends." I lower my voice down, almost whispering not wanting grandfather to find out I have male friends. "Ahaana. Yug. Sahil. Advik & Suhana?" Dadda gives me the names in one go. Yes they are all I talk about so my parents have their names on the tip of their tongue.

"Yes. They are going to Lonavala for vacation and invited me as well. Can I? Go with them?" My eyes move from my father to mother. I take out the contact list from my pocket and slide it towards them. "These are their parents number, you can speak to them if you want."

My oarents look at eachother before picking up the paper and pocketing it. "I will speak to their parents and once I am sure it's safe, you can go." At my father words, my eyes go wide and I almost jump out of the chair. 

"Bugu! No! Don't shout." Mumma tugs me down with her palm covering my mouth before I can scream in joy.

"Don't talk about this in front of Dadaji. He leaves for his Vrindavan trip three days later, you can go but you have to come back before he returns and he can never find out about this vacation, okay?" Mumma carefully makes me understand and I nod. It's the same thing from last four years. I can have whatever I want but if my grandfather doesn't like it, I can have it in hiding. He hates when I eat chocolates or ice creams. Or my father bringing me junk food so now we do all these things in hiding.

Yes, it makes me sad but I love my grandfather and I hate it when my father fights for me with him, so sometimes I don't even tell my father when something that my grandfather said made me cry. But, it's nice not being alone at home when my parents are handling work, so I don't want my grandfather to leave.